Go Kendra, Go Kendra

That former playmate Kendra Wilkinson (one of Hugh Hefner’s ex-girlfriends) has a sex tape really comes as no surprise. But what I have found surprising is her own reaction to the story, as she described herself as “humiliated” and “betrayed” It’s a relatively complicated story; some sources reporting that she was already aware of the tape and others even suggesting that she previously tried to sell the tapes. The blogosphere is full of articles relating to it. But I want to talk about a slightly different aspect to the story that concerns me… Why is she so ashamed?

For someone whose entire career (and I use the term “career” lightly) is based around her sex appeal it is surprising that a sex tape could cause such a reaction. One of Ms. Wilkinson’s main concerns is that her husband or young child may see the footage. This same concern was never expressed about her Playboy photographs. Apparently highly sexual, revealing and pseudo-lesbian photos such as the one below are okay by Ms. Wilkinson standards. She seems to take little issue with her family seeing pictures of her in a state of undress with her mouth open. (A woman’s mouth in pornography, as well as in popular culture usually symbolises her openness to penetration.) But if anyone was to see her actually perform fellatio, well that’s downright disgusting, no? One thing that has always bothered me is society’s obsession with women as “sexy” but never sexual beings. We do not live in Victorian times. We know that women do receive pleasure by having sex. These kinds of reactions also perpetuate the idea that it is acceptable for a grown woman to dress, dance and act sexy, but to actually have and enjoy sex is wrong or shameful.

Her numerous photographs for Playboy serve only as sexual stimulation for men. A women takes no physical pleasure (although she is often encourages to look otherwise) from having her nude photo taken. There is numerous images of women faking orgasm in Playboy and other magazines. But Ms. Wilkinson and her PR reps seem to think that if the public watch her actually orgasm that it could be damaging to her “brand” and “image”.

Just another typically stupid response and double standard from a country obsessed with porn but critical of sex.

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3 Responses to “Go Kendra, Go Kendra”


  1. 2 Gareth Stack May 29, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    Assuming Kendra didn’t initially make the tape for public consumption, perhaps her objection is that it represents a private recording of a private act. Or at least that might have been her objection – apparently she’s followed in Paris Hilton’s footsteps and accepted money in order to capitalise on the tapes inevitable release.

    Just because the lady participated in the creation of sexualised media, doesn’t mean she necessarily wants – or should have to – have her private sexual exploits shared with the world. Although when you engage in the creation of ‘reality TV’ the lines do become a little blurred.

    There’s also the matter of extent… I don’t necessarily agree that there’s a consistent portrayal of women inviting sex without necessarily enjoying it: that’s at least in part an artefact of the censorious nature of mainstream publishing. Genuine pornography (certainly in the West) most often depicts women enjoying (indeed gluttonously so) the act of sex.

    It’s easy to imagine someone being comfortable with one degree of public exposure, and extremely uncomfortable with a greater degree. Where that line is drawn is up to the individual. I agree it would be unfortunate (although I think unlikely) if Mrs Wilson were to suffer in the public eye because of her sexual appetite.

  2. 3 maryam kygollo July 18, 2010 at 12:02 pm

    the girl is crazy she is a mom now but she is still doing those stupid things ‘GROW UP’


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